Have you ever felt loved? Do you want to feel loved? The secret to feeling loved is quite simple. You have to be complete as a person before you can appreciate someone else’s love. This means you have to be able to love yourself in order to have a sustainable love relationship.
When you welcome love from someone else, that love is suppose to enhance your life not fulfill it. If you look for love to feel a void within you, you will be searching for eternity to feel loved. Many of us have put ourselves into a corner, facing away from love. This happens because we come up with reasons and obstacles that make us feel that we are not worthy of love. You may use excuses such as not being attractive enough, not being good enough or not being fun enough to justify not feeling loved. The truth is that you have to realize that you are love. If you love yourself, you will feel loved and falling in love with someone else becomes easier.
Our egos have created an idea of love that is not sustainable. This idea is based on external influences such as movies, books, television and other people’s opinions. The ego shapes who we see love and what it looks like. The truth is that true love is only sustainable if a both parties are complete and whole apart. That way, when they come together in love, they enhance each other not complete each other. In its essence, love is unconditional. You do not have to show you are worthy of another person’s love or make a sacrifice all the time to show you are deserving. This ideology does not mean you cannot treat your spouse or do nice things for him or her. It means that your love should not be based on someone doing those actions for you, and you should not be inspired to do these things because of a lack of fulfillment. You should do nice things in your relationship, because you love your spouse.
The core of feeling loved is to love yourself. There was you can make the journey to finding self love. The first step is to observe the reasons you are putting yourself down. It helps you to discover the reason why you are doing that and to stop you from blocking yourself from loving your true authentic self. Sometimes, it is best to write a list of things you do not like about yourself. Now, think of the reasons why you don’t love yourself. The why is the biggest part of this exercise. Some of these come from the media, friends family or society. Once you have conquered the why, you can move on to changing your negative thoughts.
You have to accept everything on your list is how you used to think of yourself. Now, you have to move on and realize that the list holds no truth. Everything on that list is based on a false external ideas. You have to accept that you are not your outward appearance, your hobbies, your career, etc. You are more than that, and you should look in the mirror and relay that message to your soul and mind. As you grow to love your reflection, you will start to fall in love with yourself. As a result, you will feel loved by yourself, and your next relationship will be sustainable.
Candice Marshall
Source: Collective Evolution
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