Learn from the saying that unless you let go, you forgive the situation, you forgive yourself, and realize that the situation is over, you won’t be able to move forward. This is a saying from Steve Maraboli. It may be easy to be forgiving to someone else but a lot harder to forgive yourself. Forgiveness begins at home, so unless you forgive yourself you won’t live your best in life or do your best work, meaning don’t be too hard on yourself. Instead reflect on all the positive things that make you who you are. Don’t focus on the wrong turns you took. Often those wrong turns are meant to lead you to your right path in life. Even though things can happen in life that throw you off track and catch you off guard, they should not define you. Watch out for these signs that you are hard on yourself:
Allowing a Temporary Setback to Completely Derail You
You might be in the thick of things that you forget it is only a temporary setback. You are where you are today as a result of the culmination of every right and wrong turn you ever made. You are where you are as a result of the every good and bad decision you ever made, every failed and thriving relationship you’ve had, every successful and failed financial opportunity you took, etc. Bottom line is you are where exactly you need to be.
Know that tomorrow is another day and with it comes the opportunity to succeed or fail. You can choose to be crushed by it or go with the flow. Forgive yourself of the mistakes you made yesterday so you can make better decisions today and tomorrow.
Putting Too Much Pressure on Yourself That Compromises Your Happiness
Not one single step you took that is now putting too much pressure on you brought about the end of the world. Of course serious consequences arise when you take the wrong course, but everything is fixable. Even though you took action that didn’t end up the way you expected, what is important is you learn from the situation so you can do better next time.
Second Guessing Everything You Do
Self-doubt can creep into your psyche, causing you to second guess everything you think and do. Instead, look into your decisions and determine if you are making the best possible decision based on information available. If most answers from the information available is yes, feel confident moving forward, believing on the outcome. Don’t be discouraged even when the outcome comes out bad as the future is always bright.
Blaming Yourself for Things outside Your Control
When things don’t go according to your plan, either change it or accept it. But don’t continue to blame yourself for the same actions over and over again. Next time you find yourself frustrated or angry, understand your role in it and chose to act differently or choose to let go of the emotion holding over you.
Wasting Time Focusing On What You Don’t Have
You are hard on yourself spending all the time looking for things you are yet to accomplish. Your day will be spent better focusing on the achievements you’ve made so far. Focus every day on the stuff that went right, going to sleep with a sense of accomplishment which will help your day start better the following day.
Even though there is some goodness in being hard on yourself—it drives you and gives you purpose and direction, the danger is your thoughts might be burdened with negativity or failures, preventing you from opportunities for progress.
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