Today, we do live in egocentric times and the world would be much better with more kindness and compassion. While nice people help to light the dark places of the world as well as elevating the vibration of the planet, there are times when it can be taken to the opposite end of the spectrum. Here, it becomes almost self destructive rather than helpful.
Caring for others is good but it should not be at the expense of your own well being and happiness.
Below are 5 signs you care just a little too much.
1. Your compassion and kindness is taken advantage of by others
When you start placing other people’s needs above yours, people will notice. They will expect a royal treatment from you. Saying no to this does not mean that you don’t have sympathy for others; all it means is that you have struck a perfect balance between looking out after your needs and for other people.
You need to know that you have the right to stand up for yourself without feeling cruel towards others. The one thing you need to know is that when your opinion does not matter, people will treat you like a doormat. If you don’t believe in yourself, people will walk all over you. Look after yourself first because no one will.
2. Your fear makes you hide your opinion
The habit of pleasing others starts at childhood. Parents praise their child for obeying them but also discourage him or her not to assert himself or herself. According to Jay Earley, author of Finding your life purpose, impressionable children do perceive this as a threat since they believe to be loved you need to please others. Otherwise, one will shunned for having stood up for themselves.
This practice goes on with an individual believing it is the right way so as not to offend others. This shows that you care too much. You need to know that two people cannot agree on the same thing all the time. How others react has got nothing to do with you. Never bend backwards to please others at your expense.
3. Everyone needs are above your own
As the most saddening and draining aspect of a truly kind hearted person, people will only see you as a tool. When you are nice, it seems more of a curse than a blessing. You need to know that other people cannot take advantage of you without you letting it happen.
Always make sure to set clear boundaries and let others know when they have crossed the line. Learn how to say no without coming across as rude or uncaring. You need to know that if you don’t look after yourself, who will?
4. You don’t shower yourself with enough love
Devoting all your time to care for others means that you will pass a good chance of giving yourself some TLC. You need to let others know that you cannot disrupt your schedule for them. You need to only commit to obligations you can follow through with. You do deserve all the love and attention you give others. Without enough care, you will fall in a state of disarray and depression. While spending time helping others is good, don’t forget to take care of yourself.
Buddha once said “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”
5. In you life, you attract needy and desperate people
In the world today, like attracts like therefore it should not be a surprise when you are overly nice, you will attract those who seek attention. You will end up becoming a door mat for other people who are selfish because from deep within, you will look to others in order to fill the void that you yourself have not filled yet.
If you have not discovered your true self worth, others will not recognize it for you either. You need to spend time developing yourself and practicing assertiveness. Doing this will attract people who are kind hearted but don’t demand your love and affection.
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